With nothing else on television, I decided to watch some of the U.S. election coverage. For the most part, if I closed my eyes, it was the same rhetoric we hear every four years. The economy stinks, health care is in the toilet, and American troops fighting somewhere in the world will be home shortly. One of the commentators, however, caught my attention when she said that the primary characteristic of democracy was "transparency."
But is transparency enough? I don't think so. I think a democratic government and the human beings within it, must also be "reasonable."
The difficulty with "reasonableness" is that it isn't sexy, it's a bit awkward on the tongue, it won't translate into a 60-second sound bite, nor a fancy campaign slogan. No leader wants to go down in the history books as being "reasonable."
Yet, I believe it is the single most important characteristic missing from today's politics. In fact, I would go so far as to say that whether reasonable behaviour is present, or not, is evidence of whether the right people are in charge, or not, of our community, culture, or country.
How would I define reasonableness? Reasonableness is about good sense, about good, common sense. It is about being level headed and fair. It is about recognizing when things have gone too far, and stepping forward and saying so. Reasonableness is not excessive, and it is not extreme. It is authentic, moral and sound.
Interestingly enough, those who are reasonable are also transparent. Years ago, when I was teaching interpersonal communications, I used a model that demonstrates this perfectly. Think of a human being as two circles, one inside the other. The smaller, inside circle represents our intentions, which are private; the larger, outside circle is our behaviour, our public actions. If you intend to be level headed, fair, and reasonable and your behaviour - the face you show to the world - is level headed, fair and reasonable, then you are authentic, you are transparent. What you see is what you get.
However, if you intend to be reasonable, in fact believe strongly that you are but act in a way that is arbitrary, manipulative, and selfish; others will judge you on what they see, not on your intentions. How many times have you been frustrated because others don't "get" you, they misunderstand what you are trying to say, they believe you to be a person very different from how you see yourself. This is because your behaviour is not in line with your intentions. You are not seen as reasonable. You are not transparent.
And if you are in government, if you purport to have a grand vision if you believe that you are acting in others' best interests, but in fact, your behaviour is hysterical, arbitrary and unreasonable, you are in trouble. You are not transparent. You are not upholding the key requirement of leading within a democracy. You are not reasonable.
You should not be in charge.
